Bob May’s book “Have Fun, Dammit” is about his return to Newton after his mother passed away eight years ago.
The main characters in his story are his son Brian, a 44-year-old who has Down Syndrome; his father, who is now 96 years old; and Vaught, a 16-year-old Yorkshire terrier that is snobbish Ole Miss dog.
“You know, there’s an old adage that you can never go home, and that’s really true,” May said. “While Newton really hasn’t changed that much from when I was a kid, I’ve changed a lot. And so this kind of deals with me coming back to Newton after so long, along with dealing with the typical things that every person who is taking care of elderly parents has to deal with. The only difference is that I also have a son with Down Syndrome, and he has really been a blessing to our lives.”
The title of the book comes from one of his dad’s most common phrases. While May was a little concerned about how the community would receive the title of book title in small-town Mississippi, he said everyone has been very receptive.
“That’s one of dad’s sayings. ‘Have fun, dammit!’ That’s the way he’s always lived his life. Even if you’re down or depressed, just have fun,” May said. “They know that’s something he’s always said, and so they weren’t offended by the title.”
And May said Brian has been the cure for stress.
“If you’re feeling worried or stressed about something, just talk to Brian because he feels no stress,” May said. “He has an incredible gift of forgiveness.”
May understands what those who take care of their parents full time are going through each day.
“When you’re taking care of an elderly person in their 90s, it’s tiring,” May said. “I’m thankful in my situation that I only have to deal with it three days a week. I kind of living two different lives. One that I have while I’m here, and then when I go back to New Orleans, I lead a much different life. But those days when I’m caring for dad, it’s very tiring and stressful. If you’re having to do that every day, man, that is difficult for those families who do that.”
May said he hopes the book can be an encouragement to those who are having to do full time care of family members.
